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Keep Houston Rich

Archive Page 3

Chingo Bling’s Virtual Empire

Check out my Video Picks of the Week: The Empire of Chingo Bling on Art Attack.

“TehChing Hsieh” and “LeWitt, Sol” by Joshua Bienko

Joshua Bienko is a Texas artist whose work was nominated for the YouTube/Guggenheim Video Biennial, Play.

“His art ‘antagonizes history, fashion, critical theory, the impossibility of desire and the value of art in the age of post-production.’”

“TehChing Hsieh”
(lyrics)

Let me spit it again, yeah it don’t matter how
Comin East West coast deep North and South
Anyway I writ man, it don’t matter how,
These crews, old news,
I’m the here and the now

Yo, your fauxpod ain’t busted
Little Bobby Hughes
I ain’t old news Robert ,
I just shocked the New
I ain’t no Pop artist Andy
Yeah we’re done with that
And nobody’s dumb enough to be Abstract
I ain’t interested in resurrecting the old
Beuys fat felt coat is covered in mold
And Conceptual Art…
what can I say?
I still can’t pronounce Tehching Hsieh
I’ll pay you dividends Annie
Leibovitz and fees
money troubles now, half off photographies
I’m no Ab ex painter
God for heaven sakes
Twombly’s alright
but the rest are all fakes
I’m not a minimalist yeah
that joint is a farse,
like funding for the arts it a little sparse
I’m a scaled down version of Jeffery Koons?
Naw, I just finished bursting all his silly balloons

I’m on a short list of artists who provide an antidote
And I won’t even ask you to let me clear my throat,
Art critics and writers and friends and foes,
Admit it these raps, are so apropos

Don’t shop for Neo’s, it just ain’t smart,
I took em all off the shelf and I
placed them in my cart,
“Did you find everything, and do you want the receipt?”
I’m like these have all expired, and they cant compete
Is a return policy written right on the back,
Or should I just leave it here with the rest of the crap,
He goes, “30 days from the time a checkouts,”
and he sent me on my way with a bag a Neo-doubts

I’m on time, with the checkups and there is no doubt,
these defeats come complete, its like I’m handin em out,
get in line you get mine I’ll politely get yours,
D. Hirst, not the first to get my album in stores.
I’m a cop me a copy, from an internet source,
project it onto something and show it indoors,
Installation artist yeah, their so damn forced,
“But I received my degree from an online course.”

Ryan Trecartin, you not a curator,
Your work is a brilliant crowd evacuator
Rick Astely’s twin, another imitator,
So please continue Rick Roll innovator
Jerry Saltz and Peppa, yeah I’m on my way
I’m a knock you out, for the things you don’t say,
I got one human eye like a Donna Haraway
I’m try it again… TehChing Hsieh

So, Como Si Deci these songs is dope,
I’m objet petit a, a carrot on a rope,
I’m a hit the replay on my Apple remote,
Cuz, Black or white, I’m the great grey hope,
Yeah Black or White I’m the great grey hope

Let me spit it again, yeah it don’t matter how
Comin east west coast deep north and a south
Anyway I writ man, it don’t matter how,
These crews, old news,
I’m the here and the now

Let me spit it again, yeah it don’t matter how
I’m a east west coast deep north and a south
Anyway I writ it man, it don’t matter how
so few, can do
I’m the De and the Dao.

“LeWitt, Sol”
beats by mjd beats

Yeah, ok, another Art Rap from the academic kid,
I give you what you want like Komar and Melamid,
delivery more Vicious than Sid
Clean, shiny and expensive like Zaha Hadid,

Rhymes scorching you won’t even need to see a stove,
More dangerous than a plan from Karl Rove,
More poetic than a poem, a Ginsberg strophe,
Ne me Quitte Pas, Nina Simone,
GPS your home for goodness sakes,
I’m like a Toyota car with faulty brakes,
I’m reckless, I make genuine fakes,
I charge For the Love of God type rates,

Abstract Art, you better think about
that shit is not new, yeah it’s been played out,
Call it Scent and Search, join the crowd
The work I be making should just not be allowed
I call the plays, you run the routes,
You fight the fights, I win the bouts,
You use color, I do without,
White on top, black below like a Guinness Stout,

You scream and shout, till you’re face turns blue,
like a Bruce Nauman but with yellow too,
Rabbit skin glue, Roberta Smith’s a shrew,
I chew her up and spit her out, like Big League Chew,
Oh, I thought you knew, I’m coming through
like Hans Holbein I appear askew,
Brand spanking new, what’s your excuse,
like Richard Serra’s car you appear used

I obey the rules of Lewitt’s ‘Sol,’
Art rap are essentially rational,
If I’m going too fast, you let me know
Like a Douglas Gordon flick, we can take it slow

I am professin,
I am not messin,
I’m am quick like a Smith and Wesson,
Race testin
Cornel Westin,
Contemporary Art, Peace Rest In,

You’re like the beat, you’ve got nothing left,
I interrupt the timeline like a lip thats cleft,
Like a line thats theft,
Like a rhyme for “depth,”
Like a the word “FALLOUT” but without the F

I don’t need a song, to sing it to,
What does this Art Rap mean to you?
You think it through,
stew and stew
I’ll be with Matthew Barney at the J. Crew.

St. Boniface’s Last Days (excerpt) by Peat Duggins

Title: St. Boniface’s Last Days
Length: 8min 22sec
excerpt length: 2min 39 sec
HD video, color, stereo sound

Please contact Art Palace gallery for more information about this video, info@artpalacegallery.com.

Libby Black, If Nothing Else Matters at Peel Gallery

The fabulous Peel Gallery presents Libby Black’s If Nothing Else Matters. Libby is “drawn to source imagery that might have an ambiguous meaning — something beyond the intended message to sell a product or feature a trend.” Even the 1960s lesbian romance novel That Kind of Girl, which Black reproduced directly on canvas, speaks to her as another label which society likes to embrace. The show is on view at the gallery through October 16th.

Chopped and Screwed

Houston’s music influence explained by VBS.TV.

Hand Made the Impulse in Arts and Craft

A great video from the Contemporary Art Museum Houston’s Hand Made exhibition.

Too Darn Hot

The ladies of Bay Area Houston Ballet & Theatre tell it like it is.

Ass Everywhere from Big Frieda

Ass Everywhere from Nathan Brescia on Vimeo.

Bounce superstar, Big Frieda, visits us from New Orleans this weekend at the Meridian. Tip by way of my favorite contributors, The New York Times and Claudia.

Magick Cauldron on Montrose

Awesome.

Lady Gaga Liberates Houston Freaks

The Monster Ball took place this weekend in Houston.  Unfortunately, I was not able to go, but believe me, I have done my part in sponsoring the Gaga in her quest to control the universe.  Culture Map and the Houston Press have some great reviews of the show.